Dont know what to do anymore 🤷🏼‍♀️

Been with my partner for almost 8 years now, we have been renting in our own place for 6 years of these. I have been working fulltime, sometimes 6 days a week at my workplace to set myself up for the future. My partner has been in and out of jobs through our whole relationship, granted his medical condition has been the reason for losing multiple jobs.

He has Gout which can be managed but he doesnt take his medication properly so he is generally in a lot of pain. His Gout has progressed to a point where its now 'Chronic topahaceous gout' causing lots of growths in joints. Its gone from one finger to now being in his foot, knee, elbow and other hand, last year he was meant to have a finger completely removed as the bone had been completely eaten away.

He wont take his medication properly, he wont go to the doctor's to get his medication scripts so he wont have any pain relief or anti inflammatory medication for a flare up. He is constantly in pain, spends all day sleeping from tablets he takes and now he cant work so there is no income on his part.

We are always arguing because i ask for help with tasks around the house, i go to work and i have to come home to a mess in the kitchen that he has made during his only time out of bed getting food. I cook, i clean, i work, i feed the dogs, i shop and all this whilst organising everything for the new house i have paid every $$ to build 😪😢

Im broken, i always feel sad and on the verge of crying. I get that he is in pain but he doesn't want to help himself ! Weve talked so many times and he tells me he is depressed but still wont go see someone about it. We were supposed to be trying for a baby but i dont even know if i can bring myself to bring a child into this situation right now....

😡😢 i just needed to let this off my chest before i crumbe into a ball in the corner