Nobody talks about how hard it really is to monitor everything so closely, to watch as your numbers fall, your tests become faint again & your “pregnancy” disappears. Not many understand the pit in your stomach when everything falls apart before you and you can barely hold yourself together. It’s hard to look at your husband when he says “why does the always happen” and remind him that someday we will have a healthy happy pregnancy together, some day we will be parents of the same child... someday we will hold a baby of our own in our arms... just not right now 😭

I’m losing hope. 3 pregnancies. 3 miscarriages. THIS YEAR. It’s only June... 3 times we’ve been over the moon excited, only to find that we will not in fact be parents, we will not have a pregnancy journey, we will not be given a chance.. yet.

My heart hurts sooo much.

And to top it alllll off... today is my sons 6th birthday and I’m just a basket of emotions, I can’t help but cry. I can’t help but lose hope.. 😭😭😭