I’m confused! (Relationship ship men stuff)

Okay so me and this guy have been friends for years. We became friends sophomore year and we just graduated. We were the kind of friends to always hang out at random places: park bench, car, parking lot etc. we’d talk about everything. Life, goals, future, sex, relationships, fantasies, fears etc. you name it.

We’d joke around at poke at each other, he’d fireman carry me, we’d drive around and sing songs etc.

I was dating this guy (super not a good situation) for like 2 years, and finally got the courage to break up with him, he helped me through it and I was able to talk through my feelings and he kind helped me to come to the realization that it needed to end.

So fast forward a bit, it’s summer, we’re texting a lot. We hang out every night like 10 PM to 3 AM time frame.

We go to Mel’s and talk for hours. We sing shanties. We laugh about life etc.

He’s going into the Air Force, so we made a summer list of things to accomplish before he leaves: skinny dipping, kayaking, naked movie night, taco off, lake day, etc.

So we’re hanging out on night and we have this game the kissing game. Each body part has a point attached to it. Leg 2, arm 3. Neck 8, face 5, etc. so we’re doing this and how you win is by getting 200 more points that the other person, so he does a 1/2 second peck on my lips and is like “that’s something we didn’t talk about, how many points is that?” I said idc, and he says “I picked everything else, you pick” we decided on lips 10. So he’s messing around, head, arm, and back to lips another peck. He says “what do I get if I kiss you for 10 seconds”. Basically we end up making out. Obvi.

Anywho fast forward again and we’re still hanging out and nothing much is happening, then a few days later the games happening again and he kisses me again and it gets heated and shirts and pants start to come off, and then all of a sudden there’s headlights behind us (were in the passenger seat of my car and parked in front of his house where at night all cars have to be parked I a drive way) he gets out and talks to the security guy and he stumbles over his words and the guy goes “ah I was young once too” and drives away. We laugh about it of course.

Fast forward again, we’re hanging out on night in the back of my car seats down, and we’re just cuddling then, we start making out and then he ends up fingering me, and I’ve had really bad sec experiences up until this point which he knows so after I’m like wow.

So then he goes to London for a week and a half and when he comes back, we hang out like we always do, and we decide to have a onesie movie night and we’re cuddling and he kisses me a little bit. And we’re talking about how his mom keeps asking him if we’re dating and is like “it’s so weird that you guys aren’t dating” and he and I both agree but nothing happens with it. He gets to talking about how all his experiences have been bad and prior to me even breaking up with my bf we’ve had convos about how he’s jaded from relationships, but we get on the topic of how he’s not gonna date any more Cali girls and how we would never date. (Mini heartbreak)

Keep in mind. Everyone in our lives think we’re dating. Or have assumptions like disbelief of “just friends” he constantly wants to hold my hand/cuddle. Obvi the kissing. He freaking fingered me. Ever heard the song rumor by Bryce lee basically describes this situation.

But then he’s like we’d never date. SO IM SO FREAKING CONFUSED AND I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO??!!!! HELP

(I’m sure there’s more but I can’t think)