I feel really stupid saying this but when I found out I was pregnant with my first in January, I went through the calendar and was trying to figure out how far along I’d be during various points (ie Mother’s Day, 4th of July, my birthday). I’m surprised at how much I’m not looking forward to the 4th of July because all I can think is “I should be 29 weeks along. I should be showing. I should be elated” and I’m literally just wallowing in self pity.