Colton James Teague born too soon the story of our loss

I’ve been posting asking for prayers for our baby boy because he was trying to come out and I was begging for prayers for him to be ok but then on June 29th our worst dreams came true. I was admitted into the hospital last Tuesday and had been there ever since trying to keep baby boy inside but after a night of bad pains the doctor on call there that day decided to check me it was June 29th, she checked me and said “I’m so sorry you’ve started to progress, idk how much you’ve dilated cause I’m scared to check you anymore but your water sac is now bulging outside the cervix, your gonna deliver soon. I was broken I called my parents and my in-laws and told them to come quick. A few hours later I kept feeling like I had to poop and during one of my trips to the bathroom I felt something coming out of me and I screamed. The doctors ran in and got me to the bed, my water sac was hanging out of me I was and the doctor told me to push. I was horrified I’d been refusing the epidural until I felt things were closer to happening so as I pushed and it came out it burned so bad. I kept pushing until all of a sudden my sac just blew up on everyone I just sobbed. But then she checked me and said my cervix has went back to 1cm and I had hope again. We sent our parents home and hoped to keep him in until viability. Since there was a very high possibility of him coming out though I went ahead and got an epidural and then I went to sleep. The next morning my doctor came and checked me and said “I’m so sorry sweetie but you’ve progressed he’s in the birth canal you could probably just push him out now and we are no longer finding a heart beat so it looks like he’s passed. I was devastated and horrified I wanted my parents and she told me it was fine to wait until they got there to push so we had them and my in-laws come up. Once they all got there my doctor asked me to start pushing. My first baby had been a csection I’d always wanted to give birth vaginally and it sucked I finally got my chance but I wouldn’t have my baby at the end. As I started to push the doctor told me “ok mama everything is ok but I just wanna tell you he’s breech so this could take longer than expected. I was determined to get my baby out and hold him. I got his whole body out and then everything stopped? My cervix has closed back up around his head, he was stuck so they had to give me Pitocin. It took a good 5 minutes for my cervix to open and they were the longest 5 minutes of my life. I wanted him so badly so while we waited for my cervix to open I reached down and held his hand. This not only broke all of my family and in-laws and my husband but it even broke the ob delivering our son, she started sobbing with us and saying I’m so sorry sweetie. I began pushing with all I had and finally got him out. He was perfect, he was born at 8:20am 14.6oz and 10 inches long at 21 weeks and 4 days. our family all held him and stayed with us for a bit and then left us to be with him. We spent the rest of the day just loving on him and crying and taking pictures. Later that night his skin began to crack and my husband said we needed to let them take him, they had to sedate me I was so frantic. When I woke up I tried running to find him and my husband paged the doctors and then just held me until the doctors came and I was sedated again. They kept me over night and I was released the next morning I was a reck all day that day and then the next day which was yesterday we had to go sign all the papers at the funeral home and see him one last time which again broke me. I know I have to be strong for my daughter but I don’t think I can make it through this

Me holding Colton’s hand as we waited for the pitocin to help me push him out

Daddy holding Colton’s hand after he was born

Those little ears

Perfect boy

In his little outfit