Extroverted SAHMs

Mostly a vent post: I'm constantly living between a rock and a hard place. I absolutely hate being home all day every day, but doing anything with the kids is too much work and stresses me out (my almost 3yr old is a monster - screams, runs away, throws things - so taking him public places is impossible and my other is 7wks). Even going out in the yard or for walks is a daunting task between coordinating feedings, getting dressed, sunscreen, etc. I will never adjust to the amount of effort it takes to leave the house, I just want to grab my keys and go!

We don't even do anything fun in the house. My toddler plays with toys by himself and I hold the baby all day because she only catnaps and dislikes basically all swings/seats. She's colicky too so she often doesn't settle and just fusses or cries.

I don't want to be a SAHM or a working Mom cause I pretty much suck at both so I guess I'm just trapped. I don't want to wish these years away, but I can't wait until the kids are older and I can start enjoying life again instead of dreading every waking moment. End rant.