Dying vs straightening hair

I am currently going through something with my parents that have let me dye my hair off and in since i was 13, and all of a sudden they think the damage to my hair is me straightening it, which is worse for it?

Dying: ive had shitty highlights, ive dyed it red several times, ive dyed it black, and i went back to red then i died it brown(which naturally im a brunette) i have also used boxed dyes on it besides highlighting it

Straightening: i have used heat protectors and put stuff on it so the heat wont damage it any worse