Posting here to get off my chest. It's easier for me to post to strangers who don't know me than friends and family because I was raised that my feelings didn't matter. I was put on zoloft 50mg 5 days after having baby. The hospital was overwhelming and when we left I felt like I was just be thrown into the world with a baby that was struggling with latching, and he won't sleep in anything except my arms since day one(I've tried alot of things) now hes colicky and life is just getting overwhelming. Straight out of the hospital he had jaundice so I had to drive 45 minutes everyday for 2 weeks plus deal with a bilirubin blanket while I was trying to heal. Now that's over I'm still feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. I have thoughts of not wanting to be around or living. I don't have a plan to do anything, I would never do anything like that, but zoloft is making it worse. I reached out to my doctor to let her know how I was feeling and she wants me to be admitted but that immediately gives me anxiety. Or I stop breast pumping, switch my baby to formula which has me feeling like a part of me is dying because of the medication I wouldn't be able to give my baby breast milk. To boot, I tried talking to my mom and I said they wanted to admit me and she comes back with "well they can't admit you without you wanting to or do me and your father need to sign you off to get you admitted lmfao" I said that's not fucking funny and she send back "LOL"