I’ve thought this for a while but every time I bring it up with my husband he gets all defensive and says that his son doesn’t have that and that his teachers would have mentioned it if he did.

The other day when I had my husbands grandmother watch his son and our newborn so I could take step daughter to the dentist, husbands grandma mentioned about step sons strange habits. I told her that I think he may have a mild high functioning form of autism called aspergers. You guys... my husbands grandmother straight up said to me, “Well yea a lot of us in the family think he has that too.”

Stepson is very intelligent. He remembers facts and details about things that astound me. He is obsessive about his Minecraft and legos. This kid can build the most intricate and amazing things from legos since he was a toddler. I’m talking jet boats and air planes. He is very smart. The only conversations he really enjoys participating in involve these things and himself.

He is very anti social and isolates himself from the other siblings and step siblings (my two girls) and even from the neighborhood boys who are around his age. If he does initiate play with them himself he has to direct the play or he isn’t interested and will go off and play by himself making up stories in his head. When he makes up these stories he makes strange repetitive noises and makes these duck quacking hand motions up by his face. He will walk back and forth for up to an hour sometimes doing this. He is excited to tell you about his stories if you ask him about them.

So I talked with my husband again about it before work trying not to make him upset because he has this bad stigma about autism. He thinks I’m telling him his kid is mentally retarded he said to me. I told him that is absolutely not the way I think about him and that I just want to know better ways of communicating with him if he does have this aspergers. I am a stay at home mom (for right now) and he works long hours. I don’t think it’s unreasonable for me to want to communicate with my children and stepchildren successfully. And he told me to get step son tested and then when it comes back negative that I’ll be all upset with myself for not being able to communicate better with him.

I said to him, “So now you’re telling me how I’m going to feel?”

I told him that I don’t think any less of Step son for anything. That just because someone has aspergers doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. I told him about how my daughter went to several schools before I met him and that none of her teachers had picked up on her add and when I took her to the doctors and had her tested for it she came back with it. He said “well yes add is much more common.” I said “Exactly! It was much more common than aspergers and all her teachers still overlooked it.”

We don’t medicate my daughter for her ADD because I have tried the non stimulant medications and they don’t do anything to help her and she has a heart condition so I will not try stimulant medicine for her. So I have found ways to help her without the medicine. I told husband that this is what I’m trying to do with step son. I’m not trying to demonize the kid because I do love him I just want what’s best for him. And if he doesn’t have it then good! I can figure it out from there. My husband calmed down and said there’s no harm in having him tested.

Sorry this is such a long post. Anyone have kids with high functioning autism? I have taken online tests that all say he has it so I just want to hear your opinions if his behavior sounds similar before setting up an appointment. TIA!