I'm a failure of a wife

I can't do the one thing I should be able to do and that's have a baby..... every month gets harder and harder and my husband doesn't understand that yes he's hurting but I'm the one who has to pee on that stick and see negative I am the one who feels broken and like shameful I can't seem to get pregnant and it's tearing me up and I can't speak with my mom because she disowned me in fact my whole family did when my husband and I married and hit very bad times where we had no two penny's to rub together 😭 I feel so lost and alone and yes I could talk to my husbands mom sister and Aunty but I don't want to bring shame on them because I can't do one simple thing 😭😭😭😭😭

It's so hard and I never really spoke about it before as I was too ashamed but I can't keep my feelings inside any longer. We had two still borns and my husband wants another baby but I'm terrified what if I'm not a good mom? What if I lose those one too? I'm terrified I try talking to him but he thinks I'm overthinking things and being stupid πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜­πŸ˜”πŸ˜”πŸ˜”πŸ˜©πŸ˜©