I am not a little upset out of jealousy or anything. This makes me feel like I'm not shit to my fiances mother, and we have a good relationship.

So since I met my bf 2 years ago anytime I am at his moms house and his ex/baby mother drops his daughter off their. I have always had to hide in the house or leave so she cant see me or know that I am there, because apparently my stb mother in law "Dont wanna deal with it" and says because all she does is "bitch" as it is, it will cause her more problems. (My fiances mom gets his daughter on a regular basis because she babysits for her.) From day 1 this made me uncomfortable and made me feel some type of way.. This girl hasnt been with my fiance in 8 years. Why the hell does it matter if she sees me??! Anyways, This girl brings my stb mother in law 3 baskets of laundry a WEEK along with her daughters clothes and she does her laundry for her and folds it and gives it back. I don't say anything because it's none of my buisness really.. But its been 2 years and nothing has changed except noe me and my fiance have a 6 month old baby, My WHOLE pregnancy was hidden from my fiances ex gf!!!!! Her daughter was gonna have her first sibling and she was NOT even allowed to tell her mom anything about it. Even when he was born!!!!! So anyways hes now 6 months. Monday I needed a babysitter for work because my sister had plans. So my stb mother in kaw offered and I know she loves and would take good care of him. I trust her fully in that aspect. After I got off work I went and picked him up. She proceeded to tell me when his ex dropped their daughter off she came into the house and wanted to see my son and she LET HER!!!! Then she said said "Thank god he was sleeping or she would have demanded to hold him"....

.... Idk if I am being unreasonable or overreacting but I am kinda pissed and dont know if I am gonna let her babysit again... I did say something along the lines of please dont let her near my son again, especially when 2 weeks prior you told me she had a disease from sleeping around. 🤦🤦🤦 She said she just wanted to see if he looked like her daughter, Thats her only sibling....

After 2 years I have said nothing... I obeyed all her dumb rules. I have hid from this girl and hid my WHOLE pregnancy.. I feel like I've had enough...

Am I being irrational? Should I let it go? How would you ladies feel?.....

Oh and if she calls and my son is crying when we visit, She runs out of the house so she can't hear him on the phone.... 🙄🙄🙄🤷

My fiance hates this situation and told me its always been this way and he don't understand. He tried addressing this to his mother but nothing changes. I feel like a secret or worthless.. Idk how to explain it.

Oh and the worst part is. My fiance has to hide from her too, because she don't like him. All their communication visitation is all through his mom because the ex gf refuses to speak to my fiance without going off and calling him names. He pays hee child support.. Ect...He aint even allowed to talk when shes on the phone with her.. Smh!!