Feeling Defeated

Once again another month of let downs. We went on vacation to see our best friend and I started my period 3 days early. I was laying there angry, mad, defeated, and discouraged. Why not us? Why not this time? What am I doing wrong? Why other couples? We have so much love to give away! We are so ready for this blessing. Why God? Then I thought of my other children and how some women can not have any. How dare me be sad? It still hurts, my wife deserves a baby so much. She is such an amazing Mom already to her step children. I just want to give her all the things she has dreamnt of. Trying to conceive is so hard. 2 years in! Send prayers and help!