Void from not having a real mother?

Question

All the time growing up and even now I’m almost 23 I look for mothers in other people because mine never gave me the time of day. And it doesn’t work like I love my teacher and my class just ended and now I won’t ever see her again and I’ve been in tears over it not that I know she would care if she ever saw me again. And a bunch of other people is something wrong with me? I’m never going to have that I don’t know why I look for it.

Answer

I found peace within myself. My dad went to prison and became an addict when I was 3. I’m 22 now, & my dad is still an addict. I have no contact. 
Sometimes I still look for the validation in men, that I’d want from my dad. But I’ve learned the only validation I need is from myself. I spent a lot of time mad at my dad, & it only made me feel worse. 
Find hobbies you enjoy, take care of yourself, find some positive friends, enjoy time outside, eat healthy, & set goals for yourself. 
I don’t think there is anything “wrong” with you, but I do think therapy may be a good start. I don’t suggest working through those emotions on your own. 
I found that because I grew up with a shitty dad, I knew I wanted my children to have a great dad. So when I was looking for a partner, that was my main goal. To find everything my dad was not. My boyfriend and I have been together 6.5 years, & we are welcoming our second baby to the family this upcoming December. Maybe it’ll help if you wrote down all the characteristics you wish you had in a mom, & start using those for goals you create for yourself. So one day when you have children, you know they won’t ever have to feel the way you do. ❤️

Answer

My mom gave me to my dad at the age of 1 and now im 25, she seperated me and my sisters by doing this because one sister stayed with her my other went to her dads in another state so i was raised as a single child with my dad and his parents i never had a step mom or anything but me and my dad are pretty much best friends now and me and my mom hardly talk but i dont dislike her its like shes a aunt or something

Answer

It sounds like you're trying to fill a percieved void with attention from anyone you see as a maternal figure. Definitely go see a therapist to help manage this. You're setting yourself up for heartbreak expecting a relationship dynamic from people who ethically can't reciprocate (if they even know what's going on to begin with) and it's a really big, unfair burden to place on people who are only in your life for short periods.

Void from not having a real mother?

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