all I wanna do is call him

my now ex bf left me yesterday bc he said he doesn’t feel the same about me anymore. we both cried on the phone (we were long distance) and he told me “just know it isn’t you. it isn’t your mind, your body, your character. I don’t want you to blame yourself. I just don’t know myself and if I can’t love you the way I should, I don’t deserve you”. and then proceeded to say he didn’t want to lose me and wanted to still be friends and talk because i’m such a “great person”. I still love him. I don’t think it would be good for me to talk to him everyday like I did before, even though I want to. Every time my phone buzzes I think it’s him. I just want to reach out to him but I know I shouldn’t. How do I stop myself from talking to him? How can I stop crying? I feel so crushed and broken