I got to watch my cousin who is basically like my sister have her baby today on video chat. I’m still tearing up because I couldn’t actually be there with her and it hurts. She was there for me when I had my baby girl 10 months ago and I couldn’t do the same for her. (I moved out of state). She had a scary and difficult pregnancy and a hard labor and delivery I wanted so bad to be with her. I feel so bad. I know she understands but it’s still painful. And now I have baby fever and want #2.