Depressed

I’ve been battling with my emotions and metal health and I thought I was fine and okay but I’m not okay. I actually feel like I’m going to break apart and slowly loosing it. I use to be suicidal since the age of 7 I’m 22 now and it’s been months since I haven’t thought of it but it surfaced back into my mind and I am trying to not think this way I’ve been really trying to be okay and not letting this depression take over my life. I just want to be happy and be the best person I can be