I come from a catholic family where they believe, especially my mom that sex before marriage is a sin and wrong. I lost my virginity 4 years ago and just yesterday she found out I’m not a virgin and that I’ve Ben sexually active with my boyfriend. I never told her and when it came to sex advice I asked my aunt who is very open minded. My mom is mad at me because I lost my virginity but I’m 22 soon to be 23 and she still treats me like a 15 year old.

She told me that if I get married one day that the man I chose to get married with will be happy and appreciate the fact that I saved myself for marriage and that he will value me even more that it doesn’t matter if he is not a virgin. (she told me this before finding out I wasn’t a virgin) she also told me that men will value me less if I lost my virginity before marriage. She says that once I lose my virginity my personality will change and she thinks I will go and have sex with whoever I find.

When she find out, instead of trying to have a normal conversation she questioned me and demanded to know where I had sex and when I had sex. That’s all she cared to know, I knew if I told her that I did it at the house (I still live with my family) she wouldn’t let my boyfriend come visit me, or if I did at his house she wouldn’t let me go to his house.

She is a strong believer in girls not going to their boyfriends house because she sees it as wrong and that a lady shouldn’t be seen at a guy’s house alone.

What makes me confused and angry is the fact that she lost her virginity before getting married to my dad.

I don’t know what to do or who to talk to. She is mad at me for trusting my aunt when it comes to sex, but I trusted my aunt because she knows more about this subject. When I try to talk to my mom about sex she just shuts me down and gets mad at me or yells at me

I feel like I did a huge mistake but I don’t know