Sleep worries .. how can I teach him to self soothe?

Question

Hi, 
I hope someone can help :)
my lo is 16 weeks this weekend and I know it's around now they start to form sleep patterns, currently I have to feed, rock or walk my lo to sleep and I can't put him down or he will wake in 10. 
But I'm reading more and more about what we use now will be how they sleep for a long time and I also would love some time of my own. 
I'd like to teach him to self soothe first and foremost and get to sleep on his own accord (he's getting very heavy to walk around) and id like to be able to put him down so I can get stuff done too. I'm worried I'll be rocking him forever lol!!
Does anyone have any advice I've tried putting him down drowsy he just opens his eyes again and whines and just basically is awake (I'm against CIO so please don't suggest that) maybe I'm doing the putting him down at the wrong time or something?! Help haha ! ❤️❤️❤️🙏❤️❤️❤️

Answer

Honestly I know you aren’t into CIO but there is a difference in letting baby unwind and self soothe by crying / whining for 4-5 minutes vs just letting them scream for 15-20 minutes. 
My girl for naps just has to be let down if I continue to hold her she will continue to fight sleep, she can’t get comfortable while being held. She always whines for a couple minutes before sleeping just fine.

Answer

We just started doing naps in the crib instead of the swing or on me and I have to kneel beside the crib, roll him on his side toward me (he immediately calms down on his side) and then I let him hold my hand and I pat his back lol at first it probably took 20-30 mins for him to calm down and fall asleep and he’d often fight it and roll to his back and start screaming, but I’d just give him his pacifier and start over. Now it probably takes 5-10 mins for him to calm down with me doing all of that...I’m hoping he’ll just eventually be able to put himself to sleep. We’ve only been trying for a couple days.

Answer

Persistence is the key. Took me about 3 days to get my lo out of been rocked to sleep. I don’t let her cry it out but I do let her whine and I soothe her by shushing her and stroking her hair. I lay her down on her nursing pillow, hold her hand and sometimes stroke her hair. She never needs rocked to sleep anymore.

Answer

I bought the baby Einstein aquarium that plays lullabies and has a turtle and fish moving around. I put it on when I put her in the crib and she watches it and relaxes.

Answer

My first was similar and I just had to have a lot of patience trying to lay her down when falling asleep. Same as you - I waited until she was drowsy / nearly asleep and then put her in her bed. I accepted that most likely she would wake up again and that we would need to restart the process. After some time she got used to sleeping by herself instead of in my arms (even though I still needed to rock get to sleep for most of the naps). 
With my boy now I'm even more strict, trying to have him fall asleep in his crib without me bouncing him or his paci. I do let him fuss for a while and only sooth him, if he really starts to cry. It's working quite well so far, but I know it would've never worked with my girl. Every baby is different, and some need more soothing than others. 
Anyway: if you want to change the pattern you need to have patience and be persistent for quite a while.

Answer

Buy the book The Natural Baby Sleep Solution by Polly Moore. It was like $7 on Amazon. It is a life saver! I wish I discovered it sooner.

Answer

Does he have a pacifier or a comforter blanket or toy?

Sleep worries .. how can I teach him to self soothe?

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