My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years. He’s a great guy. He’s charming, funny, sexy, and smart..he knows me better than anyone else, and I would lay down my life for him without hesitating. I love him more than anything.

He’s a depressed person. He has demons of his own and he always has (even since I met him when we were just middle schoolers).

A few years ago he got caught up with the wrong crowd and began smoking pot. He said it helped with those demons..then it turned into doing cocaine, acid, shrooms, pills, and one time even meth. Because of that, it kind of scarred me from the marijuana.

He has that addictive gene in his family. His father was a hardcore alcoholic. He’s addicted to cigarettes and as of right now he still smokes pot A LOT. I understand why he smokes, but sometimes I feel like he takes it to the extreme. He’ll go through these depressive episodes..he’ll lose all of his color and glow and he’ll just smoke pot for days straight.

Every time I try to talk to him about it, he shuts it down. It’s always me that has the problem and not him..he’ll corner me and get hateful with me..and when I defend myself, he just says I’m being hateful.

Today he turned 21, and I’m honestly super scared over it.

Leaving him is last resort. We’ve made it this long and we’ve been through so much. His living environment is very poor and I feel as though this will pass when we move in together (separate conversation of its own). When we spend a weekend away together it’s completely different..we’re happy and relaxed. We don’t fight and he doesn’t even crave a cigarette..

I don’t really know what advice to ask for..I just want someone to tell me it’ll be okay or that it’s okay to feel what I’m feeling..😔