So for a while my boyfriend of almost 4 years had always been close to me. He use to tell me he loved me and we had our phone passwords and we would be on each other and a few months back he became distant he changed his passcode and I asked him for it and he said I forgot it and never left his phone near me it was on him all the time. I assumed it was normal we all want our space but yet he had never been so distant. I few days back I found out he downloaded TINDER and It killed me I have self harming issues I have cut myself and I have Suicide thoughts often and so I asked him if there was something he wanted to let me know and he lied and said no. I don’t like lies! He told me when we first began our relationship that if he ever stopped loving me he would let me know before cheating on me and so I believed him and so I could keep it to myself anymore I was tired and I confronted him and he said he loved me but after 4 years he wanted to see if he could get attention somewhere else but he never met up with anyone or sent or received any nudes and I asked him to show me the profile he apparently deleted it the day he downloaded the app on my phone honestly I don’t know if I believe that or not. I don’t have any friends whom I can talk about this with so I assumed I could get some advice here

Thank you in advance 🙏🏼