ok so I’m so mean!!! I don’t mean to be mean/rude to my family I really don’t but it’s like I just don’t feel right around them because I feel as if they are judging me or as if they secretly hate me or my mamaw loves my sister more. I just pushed them all away years ago and it’s like I can’t let them back in? like my sister is staying all night and she asked to sleep in my bed with me and we could watch family guy like when we was kids but I told her to go away and now I’m crying. how can I stop being like this. I don’t want to go. I try to stop I really do. I’m on depression medicine but it isn’t helping my mood. I love my family more than anything in the world and I want to be nice but it’s like there is a voice that yells out the mean words before I can say the nice ones :( what do I do