Is this ok? Or appropriate?
I don’t think this is ok or reasonable or appropriate. My husband was nice to me really nice for almost two months. And then kinda predicated himself being really nice in the future on what happens or doesn’t happen in the bedroom. When he’s not nice he yells all the time and is what I would frankly call abusive (verbally and emotionally). I guess I was an idiot and thought he really wanted to work on us being better. He told me that us having a lot of intimate time and in particular playing out his drawn out several hour long sexual fantasies is what would make us better and keep him from
Yelling. He took off a week between the end of his last job and start of his new job. I’ve been sick w pneumonia and for weeks couldn’t even talk much because I was so winded and had severe asthma problems. It’s only in last couple days I can walk more than a couple
Blocks wo using my inhaler. I definitely didn’t purposely plan on getting pneumonia during his week off nor did I have any control over that. During these week he apparently expected a sexathon and now that he’s not getting it he’s pissed. He yells a lot more and stuff. I think he’s even angry at me that my period has to come in his off week. Again something I had no control over. He doesn’t like sex during my period. It’s his think more than mine.
Ive tried to propose easier shorter sex things that I could handle better. I also don’t really like these massive 3+ hour long sex things much even when I’m better. It’s just too much for me to enjoy. I told him what about Jusr sex and not these super long drawn out fantasies. He’s not happy w that.
Currently my sex Drive is about 0. It’s hard enough for me to fulfill a shorter more standard sex thing let alone these 3+ hour fantasies.
It should noted he withheld sex from
Me for about 3 years our relationship was sexless almost completely. It was discussed between us and in therapy but he still wouldn’t
Buge.
When we have sex I have to get myself off. He won’t even try. Is it unreasonable what he’s asking for? Especially given he won’t even treat me nicely if I don’t act out these wild and long fantasies and soon? And that he’s totally disregarding my health?
Honestly right now I just can’t handle these long drawn out things. I’m too sick. And I don’t think it’s at all appropriate that he can’t keep his yelling under control unless I do? This is just abuse again isn’t it?
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