Subject: Mothering

Grade: F-

I've never felt like such a failure in my whole life until I became a mother. My son is 10 months old and I'm trying to wean him off of night feedings(BF). I'm also trying to sleep train. Nothing's going right. It's been so much crying on his part and mine. No one ever told me about sleep training. No one ever told me that I'm not supposed to be feeding my son to sleep. Why don't they say something when I leave the hospital or at one of his wellness checks. Now I'm sitting here in my car crying after I just spent an hour getting my screaming son to sleep. Now I'm sitting here like a failure. I obviously don't know what I'm doing. My son deserves better. He deserves someone who knows what they're doing. I'm so lucky to have him and I love him so much but, he got the short end of the stick with me. How do you mommas do this? How do you get over the mom guilt? It's starting to really destroy me and I'm questioning myself as a mother and it hurts. I love my son so much. I just wish I was a better mom. Sorry I just needed to vent.