So to keep this brief, me and my husband are currently living with his sister, the sisters bf, their kids, my mother in law, other sister in law, and technically the other sils by.

Since I don’t work at the moment (believe me, I’m working on it) I offered to watch my SILs kids for her when she’s at work and her bf sleep during the day (he works third shift and is up in the afternoons). At first this wasn’t a problem, until it became me watching them when they’re smoking pot (no problem with smoking if you do it responsibly, which is obviously not the case here), or just too lazy to do it themselves. The other day my sil messaged me on Facebook asking me to get her kids ready for a doctors appointment because she forgot, lo and behold she’s in her room relaxing in bed the whole time. Just last week my husband had to spend part of his gas money he needs to get to work on diapers for the kids, meaning he almost wasn’t able to get to work for the rest of the week, but she had paid for pot for her and her bf for the week. This is about the millionth time she’s done this, too. She blows her money on pot and then begs family members for money because she “works so hard to provide for them and just can’t make ends meet”.

The kicker is that my brother in laws baby mother did the same exact thing and they’ve ridiculed her day in and day out for being such a shitty mother and how no one should ever do that to their kids, but my sil is blood so apparently all morals go out the window.

Here’s one scenario from less than a month ago: The sil smoked before me and the other sil and her bf had to go help my husband with a flat tire, she knows she gets sleepy when she smokes, but said she was fine to watch them before we left. Well we were gone for about an hour and a half, we all came home to find the youngest of the two kids naked, spraying water, all over the kitchen (everything was soaked and he nearly shorted the power in the kitchen) with dried blood all over himself. Needless to say we were all a bit shell shocked. So we look for his mother and she was passed out, we tried multiple times to wake her up and told her, that he had blood on him, but she refused to get up and kept going back to sleep. So I had to not only figure out where this kid was bleeding from, I gave both him and his brother a bath, got them into their diapers, and helped put them to bed. All while my sil was asleep. I checked her room and he had gotten into a box that had shampoo in it, amongst other dangerous items, only to find a kitchen knife on the floor. Everyone was absolutely disgusted with her, but as soon as she woke up the next day and started joking about it everyone magically forgave her.

These same parents got a speech therapist for their eldest son, because he wasn’t talking. He wasn’t talking because the parents weren’t interacting with him. I’ve taught the kids shapes, I’ve been working with them to teach them new words, I’ve been working on potty training with them, I’ve been working on behavior issues with them, I’ve been doing everything I possibly can to make sure they’re not falling behind. They are so incredibly smart for how young they are and all of that is being suppressed and I feel awful that I can’t do more for them.

Am I wrong for being upset and feeling taken advantage of? Am I wrong for jumping in and doing more for the kids?