It’s been over five weeks since my second was born, but I still feel so relieved that everything ended up okay.

The story kind of starts when I was 37 weeks. I was measuring ahead by 3 weeks, so the doctor had me get an ultrasound. The baby was measuring a little big but nothing to worry about. Amniotic fluid looked good, and my placenta had started to degrade some but my doctor wasn’t worried. He told me to just keep an eye out for labor signs or decreased movement and sent me on my way. I was feeling pretty good after that, excited that I would still be able to go into labor naturally like I hoped (I was induced with my first). Everything looked good.

Now on to the actual birth story.

I was 38+5 and around 6 pm I noticed that my contractions were starting to be more frequent. I tried timing them, but they weren’t very regular and didn’t hurt a lot. Since I was induced with my first, I wasn’t sure what to expect, so I figured I’d just wait it out and see how the night went. I continued about my evening, doing dishes, taking care of my toddler, watching tv with my husband, and just kind of mentally kept tabs on the contractions.

Around midnight, it suddenly occurred to me that I hadn’t noticed the baby moving in a while. I was so focused on everything else that I wasn’t even sure when I did last feel him. I had just had some juice and a brownie, so I spent the next hour monitoring for movements.

Nothing.

I hadn’t mentioned anything about the decreased movements to my husband. I didn’t want to freak him out and have it be nothing. But after that hour, I couldn’t keep it in me anymore. I just felt like this wasn’t right somehow. Here it is, 1 am, we have our toddler sleeping in his bed, and I’m trying my best not to panic. It’s night right? Maybe he’s just asleep, or the contractions are making him not want to move. But I felt like I shouldn’t wait any longer. So I left my husband at home with our toddler (just in case everything was fine) and drove myself to the hospital. At this point I’m so focused on praying and hoping to feel him move and trying not to cry so I can see the road that I have completely stopped even noticing the contractions.

I get to the hospital ER, get sent to L&D, where they hook me up. And there’s still a heart beat! I feel such a sense of relief just to know that he’s still there. And I’m having contractions every 3 to 4 minutes apparently, but I haven’t noticed. They send in the ultrasound tech and we spend the next thirty minutes trying to get my baby to do anything. He’s not breathing. Not moving. Not responding. His heart rate is fast, but it’s steady. All I can do is cling to that one fact. Every time I start to feel the panic rising again, I breathe and think, “His heart is beating. He’s still here. It’ll be okay.”

After he continues to not respond, it’s clear that he needs to come out, that night. My husband gets my son settled with our neighbors (bless them, it’s like 3:30 am and they immediately agreed to take him) and heads over. We pray together, and I just feel calm, like no matter what happens, we’ll be okay.

At 5:19, my son was born via c-section. He cried almost immediately. So much relief, hearing him cry! And then getting to hold him and see for myself that he’s okay. No NICU stay necessary. It’s like he never was in distress to begin with. And here we are, five weeks later, and he’s perfectly healthy.

The doctor told me he wasn’t sure why my baby stopped moving, that it was just one of those unexplainable things that sometimes happen. My mom thinks it might be related to the fact that my placenta had already started to degrade, but it’s really anyone’s guess. But just about every doctor and nurse I saw who had looked at the data from the ultrasound told me that it was a good thing I came in when I did.

I don’t know what would’ve happened if I had waited until I was in active labor before going in. That could’ve taken all night, and he could’ve been gone by then. Or he might have been fine regardless. But I’m so glad I didn’t take that risk and went in when I did. And I’m so glad that we have the medical capacity to save babies in these kinds of situations. Thanks to my mama instincts and modern medicine, I got to go home with this sweet baby boy in my arms.