Joy of wanting to be a mom

Life is full of so many joy and happiness, you can be the perfect couple but have missing pieces to a broken heart. As am enjoying every part of life and smiling acting like nothing is wrong am dieing inside knowing that i love babies so much and every month when i try i look at myself in the mirror thinking that I have hope that am pregnant and thinking about how I would look pregnant or how I would love my baby unconditional, then with all the excitement boom period comes and I feel less, but I always keep trying never giving up and never losing faith I know I would have that joy just keeping myself together so I won't feel that hurt