I just found something out

So today I was on my mom’s phone talking to my grandmother. And my grandma told me to look for a photo my mom had in her phone. When I was looking for it I couldn’t believe what I saw. I’m in tears writing this and my eyes hurt so bad.

Here’s the back story of how the photo I saw got there

A while ago I came in contact with my biological father. I don’t have a step one, I’ve never had a father present in my life. But he’s not important to the story. What is important is that he live in OK (Oklahoma) and last summer I had to travel with my mother up there with our camper.

On our way there, we were driving up there from FL, we went through Mississippi, that’s where my moms friend lives, he has a wife, two adult daughters, and one grandchild. When we were there my mom told me they had feelings for each other, but that she promised me nothing would happen. I was like ok. Btw I’m 14.

Well they spent the night chatting, I got to know him, good guy. They talked about how they were in the Navy together and all the good times they had. Well he said he had to go home and get something. Btw he visited us in our camper which we were staying in not to far from the house. Well him and my mom went to his house and were gone for a really long time. I thought nothing of it cause I’m happy being alone like most 14 year old girls. When they got back my mom just walked in and went to bed. And told me to do the same. It’s been a year since that happened and well I found out what took them so long

The photo was of my mom and him cuddling naked.... the sheet was covering them form the chest up. She slept with a MARRIED MAN...I don’t know how to feel. I also already have severe clinical depression. And a lot of issues going on. Now this. I feel so confused and numb. I don’t understand why my mom would sleep with a married man. She’s a single mom too, and I’m fine with her being with other guys. But a married man? She even lied to me and said nothing would happen. I’m crying so hard rn my hands are shaking and my eyes burn. I will take any advice. Please I don’t even know what to do. The worst part is, is that I’m NAMED AFTER HIM. I feel disgusting. I now hate my name. Please help me. I don’t know anymore.