This post is a little long so sorry but wow parenting is so damn hard. I have 2 beautiful girls and an amazing husband as a support system and i am currently EBF my 11week old so things would seem perfect but I suffer with PPD but have had depression all of my life which makes this whole parenting thing so hard. I am on meds and I do have an amazing support system were if i am feeling down I can talk to them but still I have times like today were my LO cried nonstop all day and i felt like running away which i would never do but i felt horrible not being able to just help her. Then there is the whole breastfeeding thing were everything is going really good, i have a great milk supply, baby latches great and I know it is the best thing for her and the bonding experience is great but there is also apart of me that wants a break for like a few hours which yes i know i can pump but i don't want to do that because my milk supply is just right. I think the PPD or just being depressed has alot to do with it. I want to be able to just relax and have some drinks and yes I know I can while breastfeeding but I havent because I feel selfish and I just wish I could relax and not feel this way. What is wrong with me? 😭😭😭😭