I don’t love my baby anymore

Mhairi • Mum of 2 👩‍👧‍👦 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 UK mum

I feel ashamed writing this but I don’t think I love my baby. Im 36 weeks and in excruciating pain. I can barely walk and am not able to fully empty my bladder. I haven’t slept properly in months and I’m just done. I was so excited at first getting everything ready for baby and becoming a mum of 2. But now I don’t know how Im going to cope with the labour and post-partum stuff. He’s going to be big and will probably cause damage on the way out. I just don’t know how I will be able to look at him and love him after all this. Every movement feels like a beating and im normally good with pain but I cant stop crying out with every kick.