Secret child and confused feelings??

So long story short I started talking to this guy online around 7 months ago, shortly after this we met in person and really hit it off. We were dating for around 6 months but never became girlfriend and boyfriend because of his commitment issues. I felt really happy with this man and just had the best time being in his company.

A few weeks ago he started acting weird and making any excuse not to see me. Eventually I decided enough is enough so confronted him about it and he told me to come and meet him. When I got to his house he was extremely drunk, like he had been drinking solidly for a few hours. He told me that he never loved me and felt he should have stronger feelings than this. He also told me that he hadn’t been honest in the relationship. He admitted that he has a child from a previous relationship from 6 years ago (I had asked him if he had any kids when we had been dating a couple of months and he lied to me) I obviously felt shocked and hurt by this confession and I left in tears.

A few days later he messaged me asking if I’d been going around spreading it. I had told a few people as I didn’t know it was meant to be a secret, but found out a couple of my friends were told a rumour a few weeks before I knew and wanted to confirm it before going to me (something I’m very thankful for. I’m blessed to have friends who look out for me) He told me that his work had found out from this digging and he was in a bit of trouble and blames me. He went from dating me to hating me in less than a week and it’s really messing with my feelings. I’m not sure if this is a rant or if I’m looking for advice but I don’t know how to get over someone who I both love and hate.

Tldr: guy I was dating said he could never love me, had a secret child he hid from me for the 6 months we were together, his work found out and he blames me and hates me. I still have feelings for him and I don’t know how to get over it.