I don’t know what to do

I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years we’re both 20 and this is both our first relationship. We met when we both away when we finished high school ( we didn’t go to the same school). I remember at the beginning of our relationship, it was amazing I loved him to bits and it was just fun. I think after a bit I’ve just been feeling lost and what seems like falling out of the “honeymoon phase”. I suffer from anxiety and there was a moment probably around 6 months roughly where I got into my head “what happens if I lose feelings for him and it ends”. I told him that I was feeling anxious over this and he looked like a lost puppy dog thinking that I was actually breaking up with him. We kind of just forgot about that as he said everything is perfect and nothing is going to happen. But these thoughts have never stopped.

After being a year into the relationship, i started to realise that I have these expectations and I don’t know if they’re valid or that I’m just difficult. I don’t want to sound like a bitch but I think I’ve got expectations of being with a man who is mature. At times I feel like my boyfriend is still a little boy, and has no perspective of the future and what it means to be an adult. I have come to realise that he’s a mother’s boy and there’s always a need to ask for her permission if he can see me.

Lately, I’m just in a negative mind set, I don’t know if I’m making excuses to feed into my anxiousness of if I’ll lose feelings for him. But just little things he does get to me where I then put a wall up where I don’t want to talk to him. He never really takes it seriously I just think he’s head of heels and believes that nothing will ever go wrong and we just live in a world where everything will work out perfectly.

I don’t know what to do