Husband only loves when depressed
This will be long and maybe all over the place. I’m just heartbroken right now and really have nowhere to turn and I know I only have myself to blame. I was married once before over a decade he was physically abusive. Anyway fast forward now into second marriage together 3 years married half that. My husband is my best and only friend. We have the best time together. I love him more than anything. I tell him and show him how much I love him every day. He has cheated a few times in the past I made excuses for it brushed it under the rug because I love him so much. The cheating definitely took a toll on me though on my confidence. It’s always me initiating sex. It’s me who reaches out for his hand. It’s me who compliments him. It’s me who reassures him. I always have that doubt in the back of my mind nagging at me. Always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Just living each day knowing that at any moment I could find out about another one. A month or so ago he was between jobs. He got a little depressed and during that time he became the sweetest person ever. He apologized for everything he had ever done to me. Told me how important I was and how much he loved me. We had the most amazing sex almost daily. He constantly reassured me. Now everything is back to normal at work he is back in charge. And it was like an instant switch we have now had sex twice in the last two weeks no more random sweet comments. Lots of other things as well. My intuition tells me there is someone else. It’s like he only loved me when he thought I was all he had. Idk what to do or why I’m even really writing this. I’m just in a bad place and really hurting.