*EDIT I’m not a student I’m an adult so I don’t have access to a school counsilor, I know no one is a mind reader. I’ve spoken to my mum and she knows herself about everything I’ve been through including trauma of my ex step father molesting me for years just knowing that should be enough for her to help me some more or show more care let alone the other things and my father is too busy caring about himself and his dick while he travels across the world. And as for my friend I’ve tried in the past to speak about my problems but when I do she will compare them with her problems or just start on hers and then she gets angry because I can’t give ‘proper advice’ for her problems .

I’ve had depression, anxiety and anger management for around 2 years now. But over the last few months they have all become severe.

My mum had pushed me to go to a psychologist which was great so I went and got a referral but turned out my doctor referred me to someone more expensive so we went again so he could refer me to somewhere else.

I was talking to the doctor about another health issue while my mum whispered to me don’t ask him for another referral. So I just left it and thought she had a good reasoning behind it.

So we leave and her ‘reason’ is that she’s noticed I’m doing ‘a lot better’ lately and I can’t really afford it at the moment. Little does she know how much my anxiety has significantly increased, little does she know that I’ve started to beat myself up now I’m doing worse than ever mentally and she thinks I look fine ! Why !? Because she doesn’t listen to me

My mum thinks asking me how my day was is enough or I will be sitting there explaining stuff to her and her responses will be ‘yeah’ ‘ oh nice’ but I know she’s not paying attention. I will show her something on my phone and she will say oh yeah cool but she doesn’t even look.

I will explain something to her 3-4 times and then days later she will ask me the question again and then I get really angry at her and go all physco because I know she wasn’t listening to me

I know I should take it more easy on her but it just upsets me so much that I don’t have my own mother to listen to me and show me just that little bit of respect.

I have hardly any friends, most of my friends have just abanded me over bullshit , the one friend I do have is too busy telling me about her problems that she doesn’t even know how much shit I’ve got on in my life or how badly depressed I am .. or so many times when we are together she will say shit like you talk so fucking much or bullshit like that yet with strangers are always doing my head in because I’m too shy or I don’t talk enough

I’m so over it really I feel like I have no one to talk too or listen .. I talk to myself about my past, my traumas, even just my day to day life because I feel like I burden everyone else because no one else seems interested honestly .. and besides myself I only have this app to come and post anonymously about my problems.