Ok... So a little about me:

When I was 16 I was diagnosed with general anxiety disorder and PTSD with mild to severe depression. My early 20's was hell trying to figure out who I am. I met my husband and he's the absolute love of my life. We had our first kid and my pregnancy was fairly easy. Not much morning sickness. I didn't work at the time. I wasn't particularly stressed about anything. And she came out with 10 fingers and 10 toes.

Fast forward 7 years and we have baby#2 on the way. By now I've started my career in social service and this pregnancy is vastly different. I'm at 12 weeks now and I've been throwing up having mood swings I fall into major states of depression and I've been getting panic attacks at work. Eating feels like work and all of a sudden I'm terrified my husband will leave me because of this needy thing I'm turning into. I don't talk to my friends and I deactivated my fb. I've gained maybe 6 pounds since getting pregnant but I was already a big girl and I feel ugly and fat.

Idk it sounds so trivial and stupid but my fears feel valid and I just cry. At times nothing triggers it at all but I cry and feel pain. I know it's in my head but I have no control over how much I feel anything.

Does anyone else go through this? I just don't want to feel alone anymore.