This is my first pregnancy. I am 20, turning 21 in January. With that, this was not a planned pregnancy but still a beloved one.

I am entering my 3rd year of college. I live in an expensive city only because of school. I live in a tiny, overpriced, one-bedroom apartment with my boyfriend, and soon-to-be husband.

Don’t get me wrong, I want to marry him, but my parents are forcing me to have a wedding and are trying to convince me to get married now before I begin to show (they are very traditional). With no hope of a private ceremony, my mother is planning a big, public March wedding that neither I or my boyfriend wants. The joy of doing anything to please your parents.

I weighed 209 at my first appointment which is illustrated as “severely obese” for a woman who is 5’3.

My pregnancy thus far has had a huge toll on my physical health. The constant nausea kept me from eating. My stomach would be starving but I could not work up the appetite to eat. I ate the bare minimum if anything. I know this is bad, but wow, I just couldn’t get it under control.

I am not a woman who can easily puke and feel better. I resist with every ounce of my body. With that, I have never puked due to morning sickness. That is, until I got sick.

After a 3 hour drive back to my apartment after visiting home, I had to run up the stairs with diarrhea. Which wasn’t the end of it.

30 mins later at 2:30 AM, I felt a sharp pain on my upper stomach. As I laid drinking a ginger tea, it dawned on me. The only solution was to “let it out”.

Long story short, every 30 mins was a rush of either diarrhea or my body pushing something up that wasn’t even there.

Finally, at 7 AM, I went to the doctors. Temporarily feeling better, I went home and rested only to wake up to a fever and the aches, then developing a pain in my upper abdomen that kept me from sleeping peacefully.

Eventually I fell asleep but I woke up with the same pain. Having went back to the doctors at 7 AM again, they misdiagnosed me with a UTI (wtf was that, lol).

At this point, I have called out of work and accumulated enough “points” to be fired because of lack of PTO. I filed a claim through a medical act in hopes to keep my job.

I now weigh 197 and am stressed over my limit. I am about to start school full time and work full time while this pregnancy seems to be working full time on me and my body.

I do not feel ready whatsoever but need to prepare.

The point of this post is to share my story in hopes for support or tips or to help another mom out there.

Love to all, J. ❤️