Is it normal that my hubby never initiates sex and half the time I try to initiate he acts “shy” like he doesn’t want to. We used to do it frequently but the past 2-3 years have been tough. We’ve been married for 5 years now. He’s 28, I’m 30 - no kids and while both of us have super stressful jobs, I feel like this is unusual. He’s obsessed with this football video game and COD that he plays all the time.

I’m getting to the point where I feel like I could join the Catholic Church as a nun. 😂 I’ve mastered the art of sexual restraint. I used to be so frustrated, but now I’m just kind of losing interest and the desire is fading. I’m tired of always being the one to initiate and also, I find myself fantasizing about other men and other scenarios. Like someone kissing my neck from behind or my man walking through the door, sweeping me off my feet and taking me while I’m on the kitchen counter. But I’m fine honestly with just these imaginings and nothing else.

I’ve thought perhaps he’s cheating because all my friends says there’s no way he’s just not doing it. One thing I know is he doesn’t want kids yet so I wonder if that’s why he chooses to not have sex as much?? Another thing I’ve considered is...could he be gay? He’s from a super religious family and I could see him hiding that if he were. I have no backing for believing other than nothing else makes sense to me?? I know he can’t be cheating unless he’s leaving his phone at work because I can see where he is at any point via find your friends app.

A while back he mentioned us possibly staying at his best friend from HS house and spending the night on Saturday’s so we can attend church with them on Sunday. Perhaps it’s just me but seems weird to stay the night at a friends house when we are all almost - or are - in our 30s now?? Am I over reacting? I told him I wouldn’t feel comfortable because I don’t really know them that well...

Has anyone else had this problem before? Idk what to do but I’m losing hope and I’m tired of fighting for what I want out of this marriage. I’m giving it another year but if things don’t get better I’m out. Life’s too short to be unhappy and I just don’t want to settle. I don’t want to waste my youth away only to be left alone when I could’ve been with someone that wanted kids when I had the physically health to have them.

Any thoughts??