Last night I was ordering pizza on my phone and he thought he heard it vibrate and said “oh so your phone is on silent” (I cheated in the beginning of our relationship 7 years ago) so I immediately jumped up to grab his phone off the table to call myself so he could see that it indeed wasn’t. (Always trying to prove myself so he doesn’t think I’m doing wrong) I go to Enter the PW I knew of and low and behold it was changed. So I said “changed your PW huh?” And he said “yeah, you were acting crazy so I didn’t want you to look in it and find whatever the fuck” so I stayed quiet trying to process this.

We had both just gotten home from work and normally shower together so I turned on the water and we both jumped in and were chatting and inside it was bothering TF out of me so I said “before I dead this here in the shower I want to make sense of this, so you changed your PW because you didn’t want me to find anything”

And immediately he said “I never said that, I said I change my PW all the time” “you are so unappreciative of everything I’ve done for you” Woah! I constantly tell him I’m thankful so that’s untrue. How does this get turned around on me!?

He does this to me, say something and then say he didn’t say that (looked this up and it’s a narcissist move)

Making me feel like I’m crazy and begin to question what I heard/saw.

He’s saying that I’m treating him like He was the one that cheated and projecting my insecurities on him” And then began throwing all the past up and in my face.

He’ll put his hand on his face and says “so didn’t you go out and fuck someone else”

And proceed to have me answer the question and repeat the question so that I can say what I’ve done. (I’m constantly reminded of what I’ve done on a daily basis)

And I get it, I cheated but on my life and everything I hold dear to me I haven’t hurt him in that way again. (I’ve gotten drunk more than a few times and bitched for what seemed liked hours) because I’m frustrated with being accused all the time! So I’m not an Angel here.

He says that I don’t need to know the PW and if I ever look through his phone he’ll open it for me so I’m not sneaking behind his back to check it! I don’t want the PW , the point is that he changed his story and it spiked my interest.

I don’t look through his phone but he looks through mine (and I’m ok with because I have nothing to hide) I’ll literally see him and then he’ll still say “I don’t look in your phone” bull fucking shit I saw you!

He holds this over my head and feels like he can do and say whatever he wants because “I was the one that cheated” so how dare I question him.

😨

Is this secret pw ok because I’ve cheated before?

Signed

Ex cheater who’s now worried!

I’m 30 he’s 41