My husband and I have been together for almost five years now, but only married for almost five months. The entire time we’ve been together, we’ve always had different sex drives. I have a low almost non-existent sex drive while he has a high sex drive. It’s always been a touchy subject for us since we have different views on it.

Before having our son (he’s almost one), we would have sex a couple times a week. Now, we have sex once a week and if we don’t have sex I’ll give him a blow job. He asks for sex multiple times during the week, but I usually say no because I’m not in the mood. Whenever I say no he then will ask for a blow job or continue to ask if I want to have sex. Then I get frustrated because I wasn’t taken seriously. There’s been times when he won’t stop asking so I cave. There’s also times when I don’t want to be touched sexually (a lot of times, I don’t like being grabbed randomly on the butt or vagina but I’m getting more used to being grabbed on the butt) and he gets upset with me because I don’t enjoy him doing that. I’ve never really enjoyed being grabbed like that.. also I’ve never had an orgasm and despite talking about it and expressing my frustration about it, it hasn’t changed. There is hardly ever any foreplay, and if there is it’s because he wanted me to blow him before sex. I can count on one hand the number of times he’s given me oral in the past year or even done anything other than straight forward sex with me. We’re both frustrated with each other sexually and idk what to do anymore.

Today he told me that he doesn’t feel that I love him because I’m not as intimate with him as he’d like. He says that it feels like we are in a friendship with a child together. I’ve never felt so crappy in all of my life. This is a man I married because I love him, but I don’t feel like I’m being understood.

I need advice..I love my husband and know that we need something to change in our sex life but idk how to start making changes. I don’t know why I have no sex drive, and making myself have sex just because he wants it doesn’t make me enjoy it. I want my husband to feel as if I love him.