Please if you have time read this. I’m downstairs with my child trying not to show I’m upset but I’m hurting so bad right now. I just REALLY need advice.

I posted on here last week about how my boyfriend hardly helps out with our 1 year old and how I decided for a week I wouldn’t do anything extra for him (his laundry, cook him meals that aren’t for myself or my child, clean up after him, etc.) I hopes that he would actually realize all the things I do and how exhausting it is for me and actually start helping out more with our child (at the very least). I told him i don’t expect you to cook, clean, etc. But I DO expect you to help with our child and if not, I don’t have time to do all the extra for you. He comes home and usually does nothing. But I’m go go go from the moment my child wakes up, well until he goes to bed. I’m just sick of doing everything myself.

I’ll start off by saying I’m a stay at home mom (which is why I don’t expect him to do cleaning and such, I just want him to be a FATHER) and he runs his own business and has a guy working for him. Whenever HE wants to take a day off he can...but whenever I ask he says he can’t. He told me this weekend he won’t be working and we can do some things together as a family (I’ve been dying to go to the pumpkin patch). We only have one car so I’m stuck at home with our one year old EVERY DAY. It sucks and is honestly depressing. So even though he doesn’t help me much at all (I literally do laundry, dishes, clean, cook, bathe our baby, feed our baby, put our baby to bed, etc.), i still enjoy the company. I literally have been having breakdowns lately because I’m so overly exhausted and overwhelmed.

But then Yesterday he told me he’s actually going to be working this weekend and probably on his bday (which is Monday). I begged him not to. He said he has to. This morning he ended up coming downstairs and said that he’s not going to work that he wants to spend time with us...and then I said ok can we please go to IKEA? I’ve been meaning to buy a few things he said no one wants to go to Ikea and how he can’t ever relax when he’s home and how he should just go to work. So I told him go then.

I then went to the laundry room and started doing MY laundry. He then said “I’m hungry...” I ignored him. He then said “I’m starving but no one is offering to make me breakfast...” I ignored him again. Then he asked if I could make him breakfast...I said “no I told you I’m not doing all the extra.” He said “making me food is extra?” I said “yes, because I already fed myself and our child. You can see I’m doing laundry and cleaning right now. I’m busy.” He said “so you’re really not going to do my laundry?” I said “no, I’m really not. I told you...” he said “do you want me to bathe him tonight and put him to bed?” I said “sure.” He said “ok can you do my laundry then?” I laughed and said “no! You can’t just do one thing one time and expect me to start doing it again, I told you you need to be consistent, This parenting thing is 50/50” he then got upset and said that I just want him to do everything now. No that’s not true. I want him to take over though with our child. Why do you get to come home and lay on the couch or do things freely as you please, but I don’t? He literally can go out whenever he wants but I can’t because our child is MY priority...it’s just not fair.

Then he goes “I think I want to celebrate my birthday today with you guys” I said “you don’t want to celebrate on Monday on your actual bday when things aren’t so busy?” He said “no I have to work” so I got upset again because like I mentioned before, he can take time off whenever HE wants to, but never for me...like if this was the case he should have went to work today and then stay home Monday to celebrate.” Basically I just told him “im sorry I don’t feel like getting ready ready today, I have a lot to do around the house you should have told me this last night” he KNOWS I’m the type of person that needs notice for things so I can plan everything out!

Basically we got into a little argument, cause he was saying I should just say ok baby whatever you want to do, but like I don’t feel like I should? I get it, it’s his birthday, but it’s on MONDAY. When he is choosing to go to work. Up until this morning he was working today too. He then said “how fun by yourself” as he was walking up the stairs.. and I said “I’m always here by myself anyways, I’m used to it...you might as well go to work today.” It ended in him saying “you’re just like your mother and grandmother...you just want dick and a pay check” and I said “I’m sorry, but when do we even have sex anymore?” and then slammed our bedroom door. I walked upstairs a little later to brush our child’s teeth and change clothes for the day and the door trim is off...he broke it...

Idk am I wrong here? Please be honest! Should I talk to him? I’m honestly getting to my breaking point

*UPDATE - he came downstairs asked if I’m done being rude, I ignored him (I honestly do not want to talk to him), he kept calling my name and asked if I want to go to ikea now. I continued to ignore him, and then tried ripping my phone out of my hands and asked why I’m ignoring him. I just said “why do you think? I don’t want to talk to you” he mumbled something under his breath (I did not hear) and went back upstairs...

My little guy just ate a pebble of cat food

Let's Glow!

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey