I’m so depressed and have gained 20 pounds the past year. I feel disgusting and need to lose weight. But it’s so hard for me. I used to starve myself for months on end. And now I look to food for happiness and pleasure. I’ve never had a good relationship with food. If I try and diet I end up trying to starve myself or just give up and look for joy in food. I need help. Please give some advice ☹️