You guys!!! I cannot make this up

Last night was baby making night based off my opk. Hubby was out on the town with my brothers having a few drinks. I'm at home getting my sexy get up on. Having a glass of wine (or 2) playing Sabrina Claudio to get me in the mood.

As soon as hubby comes through the door it's on! Lights are off, music playing, both of us a little tipsy. I start pulling his shirt off while we make out. He's kicking his shoes and pants off as we make our way to the living room.

I'm on my knees giving him oral...being very extra hair flipping, gagging, porn star type lmao. I get on the couch facing the wall knees in the cushions. He get behind and starts pounding me, pulling my hair, choking me, biting me gently, and just making me feel so good.

Things are heating up! He decides to get his knees on the couch also so that there is no space in between us. He starts to pull out and ram it in deep (so he can knock me up). He does the motion a few times and boom the time he decides he wants to cum he ends up accidentally ramming it in the WRONG HOLE!!!

After letting out an animal like sound he pulls out and I kid you not I felt like I was going to die! I was contemplating going to the ER I was bleeding so much but in all honesty how was I going to explain that to the Dr? Hahaha though we wasted sperm it was a first time experience for my hubby. Lmao I think we're out this month for ttc...I can barely even sit down.

Are we just not there yet or what

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