Im not happy being alive. My dad is an Alkoholic and my mom is never home. I havent wanted to be home alone with my dad since he tried to push me in the bathtub and pee in my room. I have been spending a lot of time at my grandmas since her husband died in December. My Cousin died from cancer not that long ago. I have been super down and barley get up in the morning but I do since my dad will drag me out. Im getting bad grades. I cry all the time and I self harm im trying to stop. My boyfriend tries to help but he has simpler problems.