Some backstory: I have a 3 year old daughter who is the most special person in the world to me. I love her so much it hurts. I am not together with her father anymore and I have to share 50/50 physical custody with him. That means every other week I have to go 5 days without seeing my daughter. I spent thousands of dollars (and countless hours praying) fighting for main physical custody and did not win. It’s shattered my heart into a million pieces.

So now to my question. I am happily married and my husband is an amazing stepdad to my daughter. We have always wanted more kids but now I am not sure if we should. It feels wrong to have another child when I don’t have full custody of my first daughter. How can I have a “full time” kid when my daughter can’t be there all the time too? Is it cruel to give her a sibling that she can’t live with all the time?

My daughter talks about having a baby brother or sister all the time. I know she’d love a having a sibling with all her heart. But she already struggles with the separation from me during her father’s weeks and I’m terrified if I have a baby she’ll struggle even more being away from us. I don’t want my daughter to feel like I replaced her and that she isn’t a full time part of our family. I don’t want to make her time away from me even more miserable.

What should I do? Any similar situations and advice?