Is it weird?!

I am almost 40 years old. I was raised by my maternal grandparents but they never legally adopted me. My biological mother married a pedophile when I was 8 years old. He brutally raped me. My biological mother had him added to my birth certificate (BC) and I nor my grandparents knew this because they had always used the original one that came in the mail a month after I was born. Fast forward 10 years after my grandmother's death I could not find the BC so I went to the city hall for a copy. They could not give one to me because the names on my documents did not match the BC. I had to go to court. I then learned that this monster is listed as my father and they had changed my last name. The court agreed to allow me to keep the name given to me at birth and agreed that I did not have to publish my name. They said that they could not remove the name from my BC. Is it weird that at my age I am looking for someone to adopt me so that both of these lunatics names can be removed from my BC?