I feel like my csection effect my bond with my baby

This is my personal experience and not saying every person that has a csection will feel this way. But deep down I feel this way.

Csection wasn’t by choice but because baby was to big and was breech. The day came for my csection and I kept a positive mind ready to meet our baby.

Well as we got the OR my blood pressure dropped into the 50s and they gave me medication to help. They then gave me my spinal. Well sadly I didn’t react well to the spinal and got super sick. And before I knew it she was born. Before the procedure happened I told them I wanted skin on skin and as much time with her as possible. Well because I got so sick I didn’t get that I then proceeded to get worse I couldn’t even hold my daughter let alone feed her till midnight when our procedure

Was at 2pm because I kept getting sick and the room was spinning no amount of anti nausea meds could help me.

But now ? She calms to sound of my husbands voice and not mine, she feels safe in his arms and I feel like she doesn’t in mine because she cries more in my arms unless I am feeding her. And I am so thankful to see the bond my husband has with her but I feel like I am in the way of that bond rather then having my own bond? Has anyone else had this happen ?