I’m crying I’m so lucky 😭

So to preface this, I know that my self worth/self esteem should not and does not need to be validated by a man.

That being said, I have reallllly been struggling with my self esteem lately. I weighed 145 in August (I cut weight for a tournament) and was under 20% body fat. I was pretty close to being in the best shape I’d been in ever. I felt confident AF.

Flash forward to now ... I’m 160 and body fat of 25%. Still no where near the worst shape I’d been in (197 and 30+% body fat). But to me I look big and I look fat and I have HATED looking at myself in the mirror lately.

The other night, my boyfriend and I were drunkenly eating Mac n cheese and I told him I promised I would start eating healthy again because I’d been getting chunky. I’ve legit been feeling guilty because of the weight gain because he met me

Right after my tournament. (Mind you he has never said anything bad about my body. Ever.) afterwards we went up to my bedroom and I started getting undressed. He walked up behind me and walked me in front of my mirror and kissed me on the cheek. He told me to take a long hard look in the mirror. He told me that I was gorgeous and sexy. He said “I know you don’t see it, but you are. You’re too hard on yourself. You’re amazing”.

Ladies I am dead. How did I get such an amazing man. Finally trying to work on feeling good about my body.