My ex and I have been separated for years but only finalized our divorce in March. The last year, our relationship seemed to be on a positive note. There was even talk of possibly rekindling our relationship. Lately, he had been saying that he needed space and that he didn’t want to make promises he couldn’t keep, and I understood because we were getting closer and our post-divorce relationship was better than our marriage, and maybe he was getting scared that we were moving down that path too fast after we’d struggled for so long. I also asked him if he was seeing someone so that I could understand why he suddenly wanted space. He didn’t answer my question.

Tonight, he just told me that he’s seeing someone and has been for a few months. I asked why he decided to tell me now, and he said that he felt it was becoming more serious and he didn’t want to feel like he was two-timing anyone when he came for Christmas. (We live in different states and had planned Christmas months ago so he’d be here to celebrate with our kids.)

Now, this revelation throws a wrench into all of our plans. He usually stays with me, in my bed, but I can’t let him do that out of respect for his relationship. I also can’t have him stay here because it’s unfair to me to let him stay here, knowing how I feel about him and knowing he’s seeing someone else.

The worst is that I still love him and had hopes of rekindling our relationship, but that has now been shot down because he’s seeing someone. I’m just hurting so badly. I don’t even know why.

Someone give me some advice or support to get through this. I truly want him to be happy but I still love him and want him to be with me. Help. I’m in so much pain right now.