SO delayed ejaculation

So this is my first time posting. Be easy on me lol. We have been together for 2 years. He hadn't been with anyone in 10 years so porn was his friend. Anyway after learning that we could not have a full sex life if he continuted that he swore it off but took about 6 months to actually stop. Fast forward to now. He still has trouble alot of the time staying hard enough for intercourse and cant get off. But then as soon as he starts on himself he is hard again and gets off quickly. My problem is even though I'm touching myself he doesn't watch. He just focuses elsewhere. What is he thinking about? Wouldn't it be better for him to be watching? Also, if he has ED or Delayed issues wouldn't he also have that problem when he takes over?