Do I have the right to be upset?

Question

My husband works long hours and supports me and our new baby. I stay at home to take care of the baby and the house. Is it wrong that I get upset because I expect more help from him? He takes breaks here and there when he is working from home- but his breaks consists more of playing games online with friends. Part of me wants to blow up on him bc I would like a break sometime and part of me feels like I can’t because he’s working his butt off to support us, so he deserves a break? Idk. I’m trying so hard not to freak out right now. 
What do you think? :/

Accepted Answer

You are both working hard and your both deserve a break once in a while. Talk to him about how you are feeling. I'm sure he doesn't want you to be struggling and feel resentful towards him and can step in to help out once in a while.

Answer

I told my husband that as much as he likes his job and is good at it, if he had to do it 7 days a week morning until night, he'd get burned out pretty quickly. ....well that's what I'm feeling. It's not me being unappreciative of him, or me not being grateful to be home with the kids. So then he did baby's bath while I took my shower or what not, and every other Sunday he took the baby and I went out on errands for a couple hours. In other words, we came up with a compromise and a "new normal" routine so that I'm not having to always ask him "do this and that" or vague "help me more" requests....we came up with a concrete plan.

Answer

I’m in the same boat so I don’t think it’s selfish or wrong. Men work sunrise to sunset. But a woman’s work is never done :(

Answer

He should make time for you regardless how hard he’s working. Ugh I see a lot of problems with men and video games. It make me happy that my husband don’t care for game systems.

Answer

Same boat. I feel you 100% and I don’t think you’re wrong. Maybe because I’m biased. Even if it’s not to help with our on month old I’d like for him to get his ass out of the computer chair to spend some quality time with me. I don’t know. I feel like men don’t understand a lot of what women go through after birth. It’s extremely frustrating

Answer

Im having the same problem except if he's not at work he's at home sleeping and rarely helps. His "help" is changing a diaper or two and that's it. I could be falling asleep holding our child and all he does is say "be careful" but with no means of help or offering to help and I hate asking for help 😩😩🤦 i wish men got pregnant and had to stay home with kids just so they knew exactly what us women go through on a daily basis.

Answer

It’s hard to understand what it is to stay home all day and how exhausting it is. I didn’t even understand. I totally judged stay at home moms, it’s really easy to do unfortunately. Luckily, I went back to work full time and my bf temporarily stayed home with our baby because he makes enough to do that, AND IT ALMOST BROKE HIM. He also ended up going back to work full time and now completely understands why I do not want to be a stay at home mom. I love my baby, but we can afford childcare, so that’s what we choose to do! thank god. 
My job is way easier than being a stay at home mom. It’s just a totally different kind of exhausting.

Answer

just because he’s the source of income doesn’t mean he doesn’t have responsibilities as a dad. it takes 2 to tango, and it’s not just your baby. I would definitely talk to him and try to work out a schedule so that both of you take care of baby and no one feels super overworked.

Answer

Not wrong.
My husband comes home, relaxes for 10-15 minutes while I finish up dinner. I fix his plate, once he's done eating, kids are all his. He puts our 9 month to sleep, plays with our 8 year old, and helps with dogs. During this time, I'm watching TV and disconnected. 
It was not like this at all, I had to communicate my feelings and explain my day to him. Now, I'm happier and don't chew his ass out.

Answer

You’re not alone. Just try to now blow up lol. I’m in the same boat. One day I told him I was beginning to resent him for not making the bed when he’s last one up or leaving his laundry everywhere on the floor. We argued and then now my bed is made and there isn’t clothes all over the floor! Woo. But there’s still a lot of other stuff but at least I got that! Lol

Do I have the right to be upset?

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