I don’t know if this is where this should go but I just got called a horrible parent from a very close friend of mine in my home of all places. My husband and I are very open and honest with our children (8,7,3&2) I mean like wash your butt you stink, brush your teeth they look yellow, brush your hair it looks like a rats nest. Our children (yes! All of them) put away their own clothes. I wash dry and sort. The older two get their clothes tossed in their own baskets and they fold and put away or hang their shirts and full outfits. My younger two I fold and put it in piles and they put them away in their own drawer and help me hang their shirts. Friday’s are fend for yourself nights. I work full time and their dad works full time. Friday’s are just wind down do your own thing nights. It’s the only electronic night (besides maybe a tv show or something before bed if we already did reading and homework before dinner) I was making a list for Walmart while sorting clothes and asked the kids what they wanted for fend for yourself night. My 8 yr old says Mac and cheese and chicken nuggets. No she doesn’t use the stove by herself. I get the microwave Mac and they make the nuggets in the toaster oven with me and their dad home and always willing to help ( I just don’t want to make a big dinner) I also don’t like to make pre made stuff so they only get those things Friday nights. She asked if I could get popcorn for a movie. When I told her I would my friend was like you make your kids feed themselves for a night, and why do they have to put their own clothes away. And before I could answer my daughter chimes in “yes aunty, this is my mother not my maid and if I can do it I want to do it. Also we all get ourselves dressed in the morning. Mom doesn’t care if we don’t match as long as we express ourselves how we want” and she literally stood up told me I was a horrible parent and to expect CPS and walked out. Let me tell you I am tired of picking my kids out cute outfits for the day and they change 20 times because they want to wear what they want to wear. I do $100 worth of laundry a week. Why should I have to do that myself when they are capable and actually love doing it...90% of the time anyways. Anyone else too “strict” of parents? I’m waiting for the knock on the door that will go nowhere.

Oh and she was mad because my 3 year old asked me if she could take a bath. I said when laundry was done I would get her in there. She said “good cuz my crotch stinks cuz I peed my diaper undie at nap time” she said it’s too inappropriate for a 3 year old to think her crotch stinks. Oh jeez.

Edit: since obviously what I wrote didn’t make sense. My 2&3 year old do not make their own food. But they help pick it out and they get what their siblings get. And I meant I already pay $100 in laundry a week so with the kids changing what I get out for them and them getting their own clothes out saves me money. Why should I pick them out something when they want to wear what they want to wear. I have told my kids and other people I am their mother not their maid. They are old enough that they can pick their toys up or I’m tossing them. My stepmother still gets my brothers clothes out for them and they are 12&13. If she picks out the wrong things they get mad and throw a fit. My children do that on their own. And ok “free range parenting” could be a better phrase I was just saying we are open with them about not going around stinking. If I notice their teeth haven’t been brushed I will tell them they have yellow stuff on it because the build up is there. We have low enamel. It’s hereditary. You can literally wipe the yellow away. I don’t say these things in an aggressive way. I’m just saying if they need to be done they need to be done. And didn’t I say I work full time. I got home and the babysitter left. All of my children have been potty trained since they were 2. Except when sleeping unfortunately. And guess what when they start falling asleep they trade their undies for diaper undies (what we call pull-ups) and when they wake up they get a bath and get dressed. Usually they don’t wake up wet from their nap but because they associate sleep with it they put one on. She changed back into her underwear before I got home and the sitter left. Instead of just straight out judging how long I keep my daughter in soiled diapers maybe you could have asked that question. And yes my girls are highly allergic to soaps and sensitive in their area so they tell me they need to bathe when they feel gross. They get regular baths but if they want an extra one during the day they ask. Who cares.

***also I don’t know where but I read a comment about my husband not helping yada yada. We love in a rural area. He leaves for work at 4:30 in the morning and sometimes doesn’t get home until 8/9 o’clock depending on where the job site is at.